Individualt & Communities Ending Abuse

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Is someone abusing you?

If your current or former spouse, boyfriend or girlfriend hurts you in some way, you may want to take a look at the ...

Red Flags of Abuse

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If You Live with Your Abuser

If you live with an abusive partner, here are some things to think about – and do – to help you get and stay safe at home or work.

Safety at home...

  • Plan possible exits you can use from your home or apartment if an argument erupts.
  • Keep an extra set of keys, money, and a packed bag ready in case you need to leave quickly.
  • Keep an extra cell phone available so you can call 911. If you need an extra phone, call the Family Violence Project helpline 1-877-890-7788.
  • Learn how to disable your cell phone's GPS locator if it has one, so your abuser can't track your movements.
  • Make plans with a friend, family member, or neighbor who you can contact in case something happens.
  • Create a code word or signal to use with your children, friends, family, or neighbors to let them know when you need the police or other help.
  • Be cautious about what you post on social networking sites.
  • Learn how to clear your computer's browser history.
  • Make plans to go to the home of a friend or neighbor – somewhere safe and a place your abuser won't look for you -- if you need to leave home. Call our helpline – 1.877.890-7788 – if you need ideas.

Safety at work or in public...

  • If there's someone at work you trust, tell him or her about your situation. If you work in a small business, this person may just be a co-worker. If you work for a larger company, you might want to alert your office or building security and provide a photo of your abuser if possible. In Maine, there are laws that protect you from losing your job if you are struggling with an abusive situation, are trying to leave one, or are being harassed by your abuser at work. Check them out.
  • Arrange to have someone screen your calls
  • See our workplace safety guidelines for more information.